Relationships

Love Makes Sense

Equation from Bing Images This is a test. This is only a test. For the duration of one sentence I will attempt to write something legible while placing my fingers on random keys. Pty8w 8s 9ho6 q 53w5l, j fdldzg gbjx jx kn,h z fdxg. I repeat, this is only a test.

Now, if you can, please interpret the fourth sentence of the previous paragraph. Can’t do it? Of course not. My fingers weren’t on the home keys. I placed them wherever I wanted, and just typed.

When it comes to typing on a keyboard, you have to follow some guidelines if you want the outcome to make sense. It’s the same in love. Love was never meant to be confusing. In reality, it’s as simple as, “Do to others as you would have them do to you.”

As a teacher, I spend a lot of time developing my young students’ reading skills. The goal is for the children to learn certain words, but with the limited options given for a particular skill set, some stories in their little readers don’t make sense. One time, after reading one of those nonsensical stories, a five-year old student asked, “What was that supposed to mean?”

We can try to make our own guidelines for love, just as I placed my hands on the keyboard wherever I wanted. But the outcome will make about as much sense as the random words strewn together in a children’s reader or the completely illegible sentence in the first paragraph here. Only when my hands are placed on the home keys do the words come out in a logical way.

Jesus is our “home base” when it comes to love. He is the one who created the golden rule of do unto others, and he is the one who lived out the golden rule by living a life of perfect love and dying a death of sacrificial love. When I feel confused about life and love, I just have to look at the ultimate definition of love. And that makes sense.

True Love…MAKES SENSE (Day 12, #50ShadesOfTrueLove)

A Deeper Hunger

Harvest from Bing Images Katniss Everdeen and Anastasia Steele: two different stories, two contrasting journeys. Both are hungry. For one, this hunger leads to heroism, for the other, to the arms of a sadistic villain.

Though both stories portray a culture of brutal violence, there are glaring differences between the themes of the Hunger Games and 50 Shades. Katniss—the heroine of the Hunger Games, recognizes this culture of brutality as wrong, not succumbing to its pervasive evil. Instead, she hungers for something better. Her undying loyalty to her sister grows into a sacrificial love for her people. She will not bow to President Snow. And she will give her life to defend her people from his malicious plans.

In stark contrast to the Hunger Games, 50 Shades celebrates the culture of brutality, painting a deceptive picture that a person can fall into the arms of unabashed violence and emerged unscathed. The story attempts to normalize what is a nightmarish reality for millions of human trafficking victims across the globe.

Katniss’ hunger is driven by a love for her people. This love leads her to become a symbol of courage, saving her generation from pervasive evil whatever the cost. Anastasia’s insecurity leads her to find fulfillment in torturous, manipulative lust, and in so doing she leads a generation into the same deception that has entrapped untold numbers in abusive relationships, modern slavery, and the grave itself.

Mother Teresa once said, “The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread.” How we go about satiating our deepest hunger will, in the end, determine whether we are filled or left empty. A hunger driven by selfishness will lead to pain; a hunger driven by selflessness will lead to life.

True love hungers for goodness. It hungers to protect itself and those it loves from the entrapments of deception and abuse, and to free others from lies, manipulation, and violence. The greatest hero of all time had such a hunger. He died on a cross so we could be free from the penalty and power of depravity. He died that we can live in a love that brings life, not suffering and death. God, change our appetites! Let us hunger for what is good. And let this hunger move us to act courageously to protect our generation, and future generations, from that which would seek to destroy.

“Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.” (Matthew 5:6)

True Love…HUNGERS (Day 11, #50ShadesOfTrueLove)

The Fad that Never Fades

Clothing Closet from Google Images I’ve lived long enough to see the best and worst of fads come, go, and sometimes come back again. In the seventies, it was bellbottoms, polyester, and garishly bright patterns. For the eighties—big hair, even bigger glasses, bomber jackets, and terrycloth. My high school friend called me in the early nineties, crying because she heard bellbottoms were on their way back in. And who would guess that skinny jeans would strike again in the new millennium?

Fads are as changing as the seasons. But there’s one thing that is more timeless than eternity. Love.

The call to love one another has been going forth throughout all of history. Those who choose love as their favored garment have chosen the one unfading fad. And the God who loves us with an everlasting love has always been and will forever remain.

Love is the one thing that will never go out of style. It has been from before the beginning of the world, and will be beyond the end. Times change, minds change, people change, and fashions change. But love never fades.

“For this is the message you heard from the beginning: We should love one another.” (1 John 3:11)

True Love…is TIMELESS (Day 10, #50ShadesOfTrueLove)

The Legacy of Love

Elderly Couple from Google Images My family recently lost a rare, precious gem. Her name was Inang, meaning “mother” in Tagalog—a language of the Philippines. She was one month short of 108 years when she passed away. Today, we celebrate what would have been her birthday.

I met Inang about 23 years ago when she was the youthful age of 84. At first meeting, she looked me up and down with a furrow in her brow and spoke in harsh-sounding tones words I couldn’t understand. When another family member graciously translated, I found she thought I wasn’t the best choice for her grandson. Soon enough, she was sniffing me behind the ear (a traditional Filipino greeting), and slapping me on the back, saying, “Kumain ka! Kumain ka.” (Meaning, “You eat!). I was in, and she became my dear friend.

Fast forward to the present. During the holidays at my in-laws, I was changing an outdated picture of my husband and I for a more recent one. When I took the frame off the wall, Inang grabbed it from me and hugged it to her chest, ranting in her native tongue words I still couldn’t understand. I later found she was afraid I had taken the frame down because I was leaving the family. My response was a warm embrace and the promise to stay. She seemed to believe me when I put our updated picture back on the wall.

If there’s one thing I learned from Inang, it’s endurance. She came from a time when if something is broken, you fix it. In her lifetime, she witnessed the industrial revolution, endured two world wars, and observed countless world-changing events. And love is what brought her to the United States. My sister in-law was gravely ill, and that’s when Inang determined to bring her halfway around the world to get help. Years later, she stood by her teenage grandson to protect him when he was tempted to take his life. Thank God she did, because today I’m blessed with a loving husband, and my kids have a gentle, caring father.

Looking back, I think the reason Inang didn’t like me when she first met me is she wanted to be sure I had the quality of endurance she’d developed over the years. She lived in precious commitment to her beloved husband until his passing many years ago, and she continued in faithful commitment to her family through the years to follow. Inang was known for her tough love, and that’s because life made her that way. Endurance is a rare commodity these days, and that’s why I look back on Inang’s life with great reverence. When I grow up, I want to be like her—someone who endures no matter what, especially when it comes to love.

“Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” (1 Cor 13:7)

True Love…ENDURES (Day 5, #50ShadesOfTrueLove)

Holding Out for a Hero

Superhero from Google ImagesConfession. I’m an 80’s child, and I watched Footloose. The original version. More than once. And just tonight it hit me how ironic it is that they would play “Holding Out for a Hero” as the background song for a chicken race with tractors. Note that the “hero” in question wins only because his shoelace is stuck around the gas pedal. And he nearly kills his opponent in the process. Nevertheless, Wren’s crush eventually sees this victory as proof that he is the hero she’s been waiting for all along. Who needs a knight in shining armor when you can get the guy who risks his life for chicken race glory?

The song begs the question…what is a hero? Is it someone who will do foolish, even dangerous, things? Is it someone who can prove himself under pressure? Is it someone who will trample over every obstacle in his way to get what he wants?

True love is heroic. It will sacrifice its very life for the sake of others. As for the guy in the movie, his motives were pretty self-serving. Get the friends, get the girl, get the glory. He tried to overcome peer pressure by succumbing it, which is really pretty wimpy. And it almost cost his life and that of his opponent. Not too heroic.

And since we’re on the theme 50 Shades of Love this month, let me just say this: Christian Grey is a wimp. There, I said it. No, I haven’t read the book or seen the movie, but I don’t live in a cave. I’ve heard the buzz. And I can’t figure out why women are swooning over a guy who would be so un-heroic as to brutally beat a girl while attempting to buy her love in return. The guy’s backstory is no excuse—it’s just there to give the reader some sympathy for a guy who’s truly a villain. No hero would torture his beloved, no matter how tortured his past.

So let me present the truest of true heroes. His name is Jesus, and He gave everything to show his love to the world. He once intervened on behalf of an adulterous woman whom the town was set to execute—rescuing her life and setting her free. His self-proclaimed mission in life was to bring good news to the poor, free prisoners, heal the blind, and empower the oppressed. Though he was innocent of wrongdoing, he suffered and died to win our hearts. Now THAT’S what I call heroic. And THAT’S what I call true love.

True Love…is HEROIC (Day 4, #50ShadesOfTrueLove)

A Love that Satisfies
AJ_Hearts

Lonely Heart from Google Images

There was a woman so despised and rejected that she lived in the shadows of her own world. When she needed water from the well, she went only when everyone else was gone. She didn’t want to interact with anyone, because those interactions left her feeling branded, guilty, shameful and worthless.

Most of her life, she searched for love in empty wells—in human relationships destined to run dry. Her source of significance was her beauty and the acceptance of the men she attracted because of it. But it was a trap. After several broken relationships, she had become the scorn of society. And still, she hadn’t found the water she was looking for—the kind of love that could quench her thirst and replenish her soul.

One day at the well, she met a man who knew everything about her, yet loved her with a love that was different from any man she’d met. He wasn’t pursuing her for what she could offer him, and he wasn’t condemning her for what she’d given away to others. This man was offering a love that could transform her completely and eternally, that would change her appetites and restore her dignity.

His name was Jesus. And His love is a well that never runs dry.

We often spend our lives in futility, running after things that only leave us weary and dry. Exhausted from empty pursuits, we collapse before the well meant to quench our thirst. Yet we keep digging, pursuing and laboring in vain—never realizing that our hearts are waiting for love…a love that completes us and satisfies eternally.

God alone can fill that empty void in our hearts. He alone can bring purpose and meaning to our lives. The world may leave us dry, but God’s love is a well springing up to eternal life. When we find it, we find our purpose. We find our healing and our deliverance. We find what we’ve truly been waiting for.

“Jesus answered, ‘Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.’ ” (John 4:13-14)

True Love…INFINITELY SATISFIES (Day 2, #50ShadesOfTrueLove)

(Originally Posted by Jen on the Tears of Joy Blog as “Waiting for Love”)

Love is…SAFE

Romans 13:10 from Google Images Dear, precious child,

Do you know how loved you are? You were specially created for this time in history, to do great things in your generation. You were uniquely designed to love and to be loved with supernatural, self-sacrificing, unfailing love.

My heart grieves for you. I’m burdened because you’ve settled for so much less than what you were made for! Love is so much more than what you know, so much greater than what you’ve seen.

Right now, there is a grave deception battling to turn you away from true love to a counterfeit replica. This imposter tells you that you lack value and worth so much that you deserve to be horribly abused and robbed of your very identity to gain any sense of intimacy. Please, hear this ancient truth: love will never bring you harm. Love is SAFE.

You do not need to be chained and beaten by a sadistic monster to gain true affection. Love does not manipulate you with fairytales of diamonds and penthouses and helicopters. Love does not seduce you with lies only to leave you tortured, broken, and alone. Love ALWAYS PROTECTS.

If you find yourself in a dangerous situation, you CAN walk away. Get out as fast as you can. The chains that bind CAN be broken. It’s better to walk alone than to be bound to a lie that will destroy you in the end.

And, please. Be careful what you see. Be careful what you hear. Lies most often come cloaked in light, poised to lure you in only to leave you blind. Don’t allow yourself to be entertained into the delusion that you are less than what you are.

Sincerely,
Love

True Love…is SAFE (Day One, #50ShadesOfTrueLove)