Love

The Choice

blog_shackleschainsandfettersA life in chains is unimaginable from the vantage point of freedom. Nothing could be more horrific than to be taken by force from the life, land, and family you love. Even more inconceivable is that anyone would willingly choose a life in chains.

When faced with opposition to their desired mission among the enslaved of their time, Johann Leonard Dober and David Nitschmann asserted their willingness to become slaves themselves. If reaching slaves meant a life in chains, they would choose such a life. Their declaration? “We shall become slaves among the slaves.” The men were eventually granted passage as free men, yet still they chose to live humbly in a land of slavery to proclaim the gospel of freedom to those in bondage.

As I consider their selflessness, I have to ask myself if I’d willingly do the same. Does my love for others run deep enough that I would sacrifice my comfort and security for their freedom? These men got on a boat and traveled far to fulfill their calling. But we don’t need to get on a boat to find people in need of help, hope, love, and freedom. And we don’t have to travel far to be selfless.

As Mother Teresa once said, “We think sometimes that poverty is only being hungry, naked and homeless. The poverty of being unwanted, unloved and uncared for is the greatest poverty. We must start in our own homes to remedy this kind of poverty.” There are people among us who live in chains. Modern slavery is rampant in our own country. The enslaved reside in our own cities. Still, beyond that, there are people who live as slaves to fear, abuse, addiction, neglect, and more. How can we sacrifice, here and now, for the enslaved in our midst?

While the sacrifice of the Moravian missionaries was heroic beyond measure, we can follow their example of selflessness to free those in bondage right here, right now. We don’t have to wear literal chains to be enslaved to a cause. Our daily, selfless sacrifice can do more for the cause of freedom than we can ever imagine.
 
“The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, for he has anointed me to bring Good News to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim that captives will be released, that the blind will see, that the oppressed will be set free, and that the time of the Lord’s favor has come.” (Luke 4:18-19)

True Love…is SELFLESS (Day 45, #50ShadesOfTrueLove)

A Trip to Mars and other Impossible Possibilities

Blog_SpaceDo YOU have what it takes…to colonize Mars? And WOULD you willingly leave all you know to be among the first to populate another planet? Keep in mind, it’s a ONE WAY ticket. Think it’s impossible? Think again. 200,000 people signed up to take the leap into the great unknown. Eventually, four will be selected for the mind-boggling adventure. Sounds like the makings of a new reality TV show. Oh…it IS the makings of a new reality TV show. Surprise. What we once thought was impossible has now entered the realm of plausibility.

I always marvel at the amazing scientific accomplishments of man in light of our inability to conquer simple conflicts here on earth. We’re sending people to Mars…WOW. Impressive. Will Mars one day be added to the list of those with whom we war? Because I’d be far more impressed if we’d tackle the racial issues here on our own planet. Or if we put a little more effort into preventing World War III from erupting on our own soil.

These musings come as I close in on the finish of my 50-day journey into the topic of love. The adventure has proven more foreign to me than a trip to outer space. I realize how vast the topic is, and how little we humans know. Far less is our understanding of how to actually go about loving one another. And how impossible it is for us to love with a genuine, selfless love.

Greater than any mission conjured in the imaginations of man is the mission to love one another. God, who is love, says that all men have fallen short of this glorious standard to love. Looking at the aspects of love covered in the past 40-plus days, I cringe to see how far short I myself fall. How can I write about it if I’m not living it? My only response is to say that if I’m to fulfill this greatest-ever mission, I’m gonna need some divine intervention. We all are. Because true love is not only impossible. It’s supernatural.

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you follow me, if you love one another.” (John 13:34-35)

“My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” (John 15:12-13)

“Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.” (Romans 12:10)

“Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.  Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.” (1 John 4:7-8)

“But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven.” (Matthew 5:44)

“Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law.” (Romans 12:8)

“For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard.” (Romans 3:23)

True Love…is SUPERNATURAL (Day 44, #50ShadesOfTrueLove)

The Time-stopping Alarm Clock that Doesn’t Exist

Alarm Clock from Bing ImagesBehold, my greatest invention: a snooze button that actually stops time. Just press the button at, say, 6am, sleep in for another few hours, and still wake up at 6am that same day. You’ll never be late for work, school, or appointments. And you’ll never be tired again.

Okay, so the miracle snooze hasn’t been invented…yet. But if you find it does exist, please remember me on your gift list. Because there are days when I don’t feel like getting up.

Add to that list of things I don’t always feel like doing…changing another diaper, washing another dish, folding another load of laundry, ironing (ugh), picking up another room full of toys, and…you get the point. Daily life often thrives or fails based on our choice to do what we don’t feel like doing. Getting up each morning is not on option. The same applies to the multitude of other monotonous but necessary daily tasks. Even the most coveted of jobs involves a certain degree of unappealing, mundane routine.

It’s the same in love. In every relationship, there comes a point where we must choose to love. I’ve been married almost twenty years, and I know. There are days when it’s truly, madly, deeply, and days when we’ve lost that loving feeling. First-date feelings fade. Honeymoon euphoria evaporates. The daily grind drones and drains. But no relationship lasts without the determination to love at all times.

Relationships, like buildings, need a firm foundation to stand. While emotions are an integral part of life, they make for a flimsy foundation. Feelings evolve more frequently than a quick-change artist. Relationships that rely solely on sentiment are doomed to fail. True love goes beyond feelings. It’s a commitment to love someone whatever the cost, even when emotion runs dry. And the reward of endurance is deeply rich, satisfying, and lasting relationships.

True Love…Goes BEYOND FEELINGS (Day 43, #50ShadesOfTrueLove)

Pondering Life While Stuck in Traffic

Traffic Jam from Bing ImagesI’ve often waited in a good hour of highway traffic only to find it was due to a gapers’ delay. Miles of traffic, stretched as a crawling snake along the interstate—and all because people want to pause and look at someone else’s tragedy. What is it that draws us to the scene?

It may be that our attention is caught by the spectacle of material brevity. We see firsthand a truth long suppressed—that those things that so hold our affections could be destroyed in an instant. Beyond that is the harsh reminder of how fragile life is. We gaze at the accident site with a vague awareness it could happen to us, along with a fleeting hope we’ll be the ones to escape such a fate.

Layered beneath it all may be a degree of genuine concern. We wonder what happened, how it happened, and if those involved are okay. If we remember, we’ll check the news for updates later that day before resuming life as usual.

Our attitudes under such circumstances may translate to how we react to the tragedies we encounter in daily life. We pause, we gaze, we feel a tinge of concern…and we move on. As long as it doesn’t affect us, we’re only slightly moved, though in the end unchanged.

Love is more than gapers’ emotion. It’s not a fleeting concern or a passing feeling. It’s not drive-by sensitivity. Love doesn’t just pause. It stops. It feels deeply. And it acts.

First responders are those who demonstrate love in action—caring enough to meet the need, as in the parable of the Good Samaritan. A man lay beaten and dying on the road as people passed him by, unmoved. Only one stopped to help, investing his time, his resources, and his very life to meet the need.

God, I don’t want my love to be a fleeting emotion. I want to feel deeply, to the point I am moved to action, whatever the cost. Give me this kind of love—a true love, filled with compassion.
 
True Love…is COMPASSIONATE (Day 41, #50ShadesOfTrueLove)

I Would Have Loved a Green, One-eyed Alien Child

Mother Child Shadow from Bing ImagesPeople say the most interesting things when it comes to the topic of adoption. Often humorous, sometimes rude, occasionally ignorant, but always interesting. Among the most interesting comments we’ve received is, “Of course you picked them. They’re so cute.” (Implying we chose our kids according to their most obviously endearing quality.)

Often, my response is a simple, polite smile. I usually don’t think of a good response until after the fact. As for the comment in question, I didn’t have an immediate reply except to say, “They ARE cute.”

And they ARE. Irresistably, impossibly, just-look-at-me-with-those-big-brown-eyes-and-I’ll-give-you-the-world…CUTE. But truth is, we had no idea what our kids would look like when we started the adoption process. They could have been green, one-eyed alien children for all we knew. We were ready, and willing, to love them—before we ever knew them. The fact that they happened to be so incredibly cute was an unexpected blessing.

Contrary to popular though immensely misguided belief, adoption is not about finally getting that much-desired bundle of joy. It’s not about filling empty, longing arms with a sweet, cuddly baby. And it’s not about picking a cute, lovable kid to add ascetic value to the next family photo.

Adoption is a permanent choice to invest our lives in a PERSON who will be part of our family…for life. That adorably innocent baby will one day grow to become a child, a teen, and, eventually, an adult. That’s why adoption is a long-haul commitment. It’s a binding decision to love at all costs, no matter what and for as long as we have breath. As with a biological child, relationship with an adopted child is a lifelong investment. They are loved, and they are family, no matter what they look like, who they are, what they do, or who they become. And their value is worth more than the greatest treasure we can imagine.

The Bible says God loved us before we were even born. His commitment to love runs so deep he sent his only son to die that we could be reconciled in relationship with him. And he willingly adopts us into his own family, should we chose to accept his invitation. This love is a binding love that doesn’t give up and doesn’t let go. No matter what.

“God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure.” (Ephesians 1:5)

True Love…is BINDING (Day 40, #50ShadesOfTrueLove)

Not Quite Generous

Giving Love from Bing ImagesI was wondering why my baby boy was going through food so quickly while the puppy was getting so chubby. So when they thought I wasn’t watching, I spied on them and discovered the baby was feeding the puppy his extra food. It seems they had an unspoken food-sharing agreement going on behind my back. Whenever the baby had an abundance of food, he was more than happy to share with the puppy. But when I gave him only a couple bites at a time, he was a little more stingy with his offerings—much to the puppy’s dismay.

It’s easy to give when we have abundance. Our local newspaper runs an annual tally of the nation’s most generous people. Usually those featured are the wealthiest among us. It’s a noble thing, to give. But is giving truly generous when it comes only from abundance? If there’s no sacrifice, is it generosity at all?

I’ve heard it said that generosity is not measured by how much a person gives, but by what percentage, and what’s left over after the giving. It’s admirable that a millionaire gives a big chunk of their income to charity, but it’s not so hard to do when there’s mansions, vacation homes, luxury cars, and an infinite supply of gourmet food waiting when the giving’s done.

The more interesting newspaper article would be…who lives on the least so they could give the most? Of course, this article wouldn’t exist, because sacrificial giving is most often matched with genuine humility. When giving is self-serving—to draw attention to self and to inflate an image of nobility, it is not generosity but selfishness in disguise.

Lord, I pray you’d give me a truly generous heart—that I would give even when it’s hard and when it hurts. Let me give abundantly and sacrificially, with humility. I don’t want my giving to be self-serving, but to come from a heart of genuine love for others.

True Love…is GENEROUS (Day 39, #50ShadesOfTrueLove)

Freedom’s Cost

blog_rockingchairShe was finally free, but she refused to forget those still in chains. While she could have lived in relative safety, she chose to risk her life to rescue those bound as she once was. Harriet Tubman knew the danger she would face in returning to the place of her own bondage for the sake of those enslaved. Yet she considered their lives and valued their freedom more highly than her own.

Had I lived the nightmare she lived, I wonder if I’d so willingly return. It would be so easy to slip into obscurity, to hide in the shelter of freedom—forgetting those who suffered I once had. The prospect of losing my newfound freedom might overshadow the potential freedom of others.

What would motivate a former slave to risk life and freedom for the sake of others? This woman who endured such unthinkable hardships came through the furnace of affliction with great faith. She once said, “Twant me, ’twas the Lord. I always told him, ‘I trust to you. I don’t know where to go or what to do, but I expect you to lead me,’ and He always did.”

The same God who led her is the God who had heard the cry of the slaves in the days of the Exodus, who upon seeing the oppression of a people in chains spoke these words: “I have indeed seen the misery of my people in Egypt. I have heard them crying out because of their slave drivers, and I am concerned about their suffering. So I have come down to rescue them…” (Exodus 3:7-8)

True love sees the needs of those in chains. And true love hears their cries. But it doesn’t stop there. True love is compassionate. And true love rescues.

Slavery is said to have been abolished years ago, but it continues today. Thousands are trafficked and sold across our own borders. We have a choice. Will we close our eyes to the need? Will we ignore the cry? Or will we see, hear, and act in compassion? Because only true love can set a captive free.

True Love…FREES (Day 38, #50ShadesOfTrueLove)

Photo Credit: Harriet Tubman Underground Railroad Byway | Bucktown Village… | Flickr